A Decade within political circles: a personal reflection on experience and disillusionment

Today, I would like to share my experience with political parties. When I first entered politics, particularly leftist political circles

Today, I would like to share my experience with political parties. When I first entered politics, particularly leftist political circles, I actively participated with friends in protests, demonstrations, gatherings, and rallies, moving hand in hand with them. At that time, their behavior, traditions, dialogue, and manner of interaction appeared highly commendable. However, with the passage of time, I came to realize many other underlying aspects.

Actually, I came to know about many realities behind these faces. Many individuals in small cities, who held positions such as district presidents and district general secretaries, often appeared highly committed to the younger generation. Theoretically, they spoke well and seemed to be noble persons. Their knowledge was limited, mostly acquired through gatherings, protests, listening to learned people, and active participation rather than formal study. They were not well-read individuals. However, over time, many underlying aspects became evident. They were largely driven by vested interests. Most of them were above the age of thirty, meaning whatever investment they had to make in their own careers had already been completed. Their period of study, learning, and career development was over, and further academic or professional improvement was no longer their priority. In contrast, they often ended up influencing and, in some cases, negatively affecting the careers of others, particularly the youth—students, undergraduates, and college and university learners—who were easily shaped by their conduct.
They had already established some business or secured a modest job, whether in employment or small-scale enterprise. At that stage, what they primarily sought was power. They desired social identity, public gatherings, and a structured way to utilize their free time effectively. Their main focus remained their business or job, but the remaining time they wished to invest strategically in acquiring a certain level of influence. However, they often concealed these motives behind the lens of ideology. They strongly criticized governmental departments and political parties, presenting themselves as anti-establishment and particularly anti–People’s Party in Sindh. Yet, in practice, after attaining even a small degree of power, their behaviour toward junior comrades largely resembled that of those already in government.
They actually misused and manipulated younger individuals. Later, I also came into contact with other senior comrades who shared a similar outlook to mine. These were people who still had their future ahead of them and were consciously investing their time, effort, resources, and energy to shape it. With the passage of time, many of them also gradually moved away from the party. During this period, they often shared their concerns with me, and by then I had already reached the same conclusion, which ultimately led me to distance myself from such political groups. In reality, there was extensive exploitation of the younger generation—of their time, energy, and money. Although these influential figures did invest labour, effort, and time, it was largely in a calculated manner. In practical terms, every investment of theirs—whether of time, energy, or money—was strategically beneficial for them. However, it brought little or no real benefit to the younger participants.
While this may not be a universal experience and may not reflect the reality of all others, it is, however, my personal observation spanning nearly seven to eight years. It can be said that I invested more than seven years in total, although the period of active and meaningful engagement was approximately three years. After that, I gradually sidelined myself. I remain connected with them, but I no longer invest my time and effort significantly. I now treat it more as a part-time involvement, limited only to participation, without any deeper commitment or concern. This is purely my personal experience, and it may not necessarily be true in broader terms. I also acknowledge that by expressing such views, I might be labeled as apolitical or even considered aligned with governmental circles. However, this remains genuinely my lived experience.