It Ends With Us

By: Sassi Nasir Ali

Love is not always enough. We are taught from childhood that love overcomes all, that if two people love each other deeply enough, they can overcome anything. This myth is repeated in songs, films and whispered promises, has made many of us believe that endurance is the same as devotion, that staying is always braver than leaving.

I was also affected by such meaningless myths. But not until I was recommended to read an enthralling book by an American author from Sulphur Springs, Texas, Colleen Hoover, who has written mesmerising books, including It Ends with Us, her most personal and difficult work.

It Ends with Us was published in 2016 and consists of 376 pages, a book in which the ugly reality of love is depicted broadly. The captivating book has helped me find the true and painful nature of love, which is beyond expectations. While reading this book, each word made me repent of the image of love I had created in my mind.

The story follows Lily Bloom, a young woman who opens a flower shop in Boston and meets Ryle Kincaid, a charming neurosurgeon.

Their love feels perfect at first, but soon Ryle reveals his dark side slowly, he hurts her.

He says sorry. He promises it will not happen again. But it does. Lily finds herself stuck in a cycle she never wanted, just like her mother did years ago. Her old love, Atlas, comes back and reminds her of the girl she used to be, the girl who once said she would never accept this.

It Ends with Us created a facile way to understand that love and abuse cannot coexist, and to believe that everything that I have ever been taught about patience and forgiveness was not always wisdom. In the journey of life, neither was I alone in my confusion, nor will I ever be, because the courage to leave exists within all of us, waiting to be recognised and embraced.

Additionally, the myths that created an image about enduring love were merely a thought. The fact is: “There is no such thing as bad people. We’re all just people who sometimes do bad things.” And my thoughts created my experiences about love, which were all hopeful, till I got to know that good people can still do terrible things, and that recognising this is not pessimism, it is clarity.

It was an adorable experience to feel the strength of Lily’s choice, and it taught me to admire and respect myself, because I feel that all things in life have already come to us, including the right to walk away. As beautifully quoted, “Where there is haste, there must be a mistake.” But sometimes, the real mistake is staying too long.

Moreover, this fascinating book made me realise that through my actions and choices, I was not only representing who I was, but also the generations before me, because their silence and my voice were on a thread. Therefore, today I have learned to be grateful for the courage I have found.

Besides that, I have been able to maintain a strong belief and trust in myself, that I guide me for the best, holding my own hand and taking me towards the dawn of a beautiful morning. All true benefits are mutual; the changes I have observed in me are worth sharing.

Therefore, I would like to recommend this book to those who are interested in having a positive relationship with themselves. This book will help them feel the everlasting presence of their own strength.

Sassi Nasir Ali is a student at Balochistan University of Engineering and Technology, Sub-Campus, Turbat (BUETK). She writes on social issues, youth development, education and women’s rights, with a particular focus on challenges facing communities in Balochistan and can be reached at [email protected].