Summary
- I’ve already made it clear from the beginning that I will not tolerate such unnecessary behavior in the future.” Tahir Amir You have shown great patience and worked hard to take care of your home, so being humiliated in front of everyone is understandably very painful.
- It is not right for your husband to take out his anger on you or blame you for other people’s mistakes, especially in front of others.
- If he does not understand, then show him that a dignified woman who can manage a home can also assert herself and take control when needed.
My marriage is about to complete 14 years, and I have two children. I live with my in-laws.
The issue is that my husband cheated on me for about five years. He had affairs outside the marriage. I tolerated a lot, and we had many arguments because of it. Things have improved somewhat now.
He taught me how to drive and gives me a good monthly allowance. However, whenever he gets angry, he doesn’t care who is around. He starts insulting and humiliating me in a very hurtful way. Even if someone else is at fault, he takes his anger out on me.
Today, we had a family gathering at home. My sisters-in-law and other relatives were visiting. All the children were playing with water guns, and the house got wet. He blamed me for it and humiliated me in front of everyone, including the children. He asked why I hadn’t stopped them, even though I was constantly cleaning up after them.
I had been working in the kitchen since morning, looking after my own children, serving everyone, bringing juice to some people and green tea to others. And in the end, this is what I got in return.
This is not just about today. Whenever there are a lot of people around, he behaves like this. At the very least, he could speak to me privately in our room. Instead, he insults me in front of relatives, guests, and even household staff.
What should I do? I am crying so much right now. Today, I feel like I have reached my limit. Please give your advice. Thanks.
Solutions; Areena Khan
“Treat people the way they treat you. If he insults you in front of everyone, then respond to him in front of everyone. It’s as simple as that. If you keep tolerating humiliation, the other person will continue to humiliate you.
I personally would never put up with this. I’ve already made it clear from the beginning that I will not tolerate such unnecessary behavior in the future.”
Tahir Amir
You have shown great patience and worked hard to take care of your home, so being humiliated in front of everyone is understandably very painful.
It is not right for your husband to take out his anger on you or blame you for other people’s mistakes, especially in front of others.
When things are calm, try to tell him clearly that you can handle disagreements, but you cannot accept being humiliated or disrespected.
For now, take care of yourself. Cry if you need to, but do not make any major decisions while you are feeling overwhelmed by anger or hurt.
Ahsan khan
Seek patience and help through prayer. InshaAllah, very soon your husband will realize that he has been doing wrong. And please, it is my humble request to you that you should not ruin your home because of what others say or influence you with their words. Those who give such advice will not come to help you later. Our mothers used to endure hardships without even complaining.
Adv Arshad Bhatti
Try to resolve this issue by being friendly with your husband. Secondly, gradually strengthen your own temperament. Husband and wife have equal rights. You are an important member of this household. If he does not understand, then show him that a dignified woman who can manage a home can also assert herself and take control when needed.
The post is taken from DHA Ladies official group from Facebook and has more than 142k followers.
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