TV actress Saima Qureshi urges mothers-in-law to break cycle of mistreatment

Pakistani actress Saima Qureshi has urged mothers-in-law to learn from their own difficult experiences and avoid repeating patterns of mistreatment with their daughters-in-law.

KARACHI: Pakistani actress Saima Qureshi has urged mothers-in-law to learn from their own difficult experiences and avoid repeating patterns of mistreatment with their daughters-in-law.

Qureshi said women who had faced difficult treatment from their own mothers-in-law should instead use those experiences to build healthier relationships with the women who join their families.

“I have seen mothers-in-law who go through the worst themselves, yet they repeat the same behaviour with their daughters-in-law. But why? If that has happened to her, she should do the opposite and treat her daughter-in-law differently,” she said on a private television programme.

“I feel it is really bad how mothers-in-law misbehave with their daughters-in-law,” she added.

The actress also said husbands have an important responsibility in ensuring that their wives are treated with respect at home.

“Men also get stuck choosing sides between their mother and wife, which should not be the case. When a couple gets married, their relationship should be a priority,” she said.

Qureshi further argued that husbands should educate themselves about the physical and emotional changes their wives may experience rather than relying entirely on their mothers for guidance.

“You have access to ChatGPT and YouTube. Husbands should take care of their wives and have the responsibility and understanding that their wives can experience changes or mood swings, especially during pregnancy,” she said.

“Men are not small kids who need their parents to teach them these things,” she added.

Discussing her own experience, Qureshi praised her mother-in-law and said she had received considerable support during difficult emotional stages.

“My mother-in-law was such a good person that I do not have the words for it,” she said.

The actress said her experience taught her that parents should be honest about themselves when welcoming a woman into their family.

“My experience during pregnancy was very good, but generally speaking, I feel that when you get your children married, you should go in with the mindset of showing your true selves from day one,” she said.

“If men expect the girl to respect their parents, they should be expected to do the same with hers,” she added.

Qureshi said many of the issues between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law were basic matters of mutual respect and understanding.

“We are discussing this topic here even though these are just basic human things. You need to live nicely with each other and treat your daughters-in-law the same way you treat your daughters, because you were also a daughter yourself,” she said.

She further argued that husbands could play a decisive role in resolving family conflicts by standing up for their wives.

“The main problem with all these talks is actually the husband because if he does not take a stand for you, nothing will change,” Qureshi said.

Qureshi has raised three sons as a single mother while continuing to work in the entertainment industry. Her recent projects include “Ghulam Badshah Sundri” and “Duniyapur”.