Summary
- I am a proud father because my daughter secured admission to a school where entry is nearly impossible, no matter how much money or influence you have: Convent of Jesus and Mary.
- I’m proud because she had never attended school before, nor gone through any structured academic preparation at home, yet she still made it.
- I am a proud son and brother because we were surrounded by family who supported our decision to keep our child out of school until nearly five.
For couples facing societal pressure to have a baby, I have something to say: there is an even bigger pressure waiting for you once the baby arrives. First, everyone will want your child in school as soon as possible. Then comes the brand of the school you choose. Brace yourselves!
My daughter, Marjaan Ali, is 4 years and 8 months old and we have just enrolled her in school. Today, I am a proud father, husband, son, and brother — prouder and happier than you can imagine. Let me explain why.
I am a proud father because my daughter secured admission to a school where entry is nearly impossible, no matter how much money or influence you have: Convent of Jesus and Mary. That is an achievement. I’m proud because she had never attended school before, nor gone through any structured academic preparation at home, yet she still made it. I’m proud because she has carried forward a family legacy.
I am a proud husband because my wife stood firmly by our decision to keep our children home until this age. I’m proud because she single-handedly fought off all the noise, visuals, and stray advice of the digital age (it is far harder for a mother). I’m proud that in this era of AI agents, she prioritised culture and character building over the flashy offerings of modern schools. I’m proud that we refused to get swept up in the herd mentality of rushing children into small but pretentious schools that often run on insecurity and one-upmanship.
I am a proud son and brother because we were surrounded by family who supported our decision to keep our child out of school until nearly five. I’m proud that my mother acted as our North Star in this dark night of materialism and media influence. I’m proud of my sisters, who are from Convent themselves, for helping us maintain balance and park sanely in society — offering the perfect amount of concern. Marjaan is the first child in our family.
So yes, I am happy.
I’m happy because my daughter is almost five and is ready — eager, in fact — to engage with the world. I’m happy she spent her foundational years surrounded only by the people who love her most. I’m happy she is filled with love and compassion and will enter school with unmatched energy. I also feel emotional knowing these precious days at home won’t return, but I say with a full heart and puffed chest that she spent them all with us. This will strengthen her social and emotional intelligence for life. She is truly ready to learn.
I’m also fortunate to have been born in the 1980s and to have done my O and A Levels. We were among the very first large batches to go through the Cambridge system in Pakistan. At that time, Beaconhouse and City School were the big names. Lahore Grammar School (LGS) wasn’t yet the giant it is today — people initially saw it as a Karachi Grammar School branch, but it wasn’t. It later took off when Conventarians had limited options after O Levels and ended up taking distinctions at LGS or Kinnaird, as they were among the few offering further education for girls. It’s not that I’m an outsider to these schools. We too were caught in the first waves of evening academies. You can ask any of Lahore’s top Physics, Chemistry, and Math teachers about me.
In my view, parents who send their kids to school before age five usually do so because they feel their home environment is inadequate, because they want to offload the responsibility, or simply to follow fashion. Very few have genuinely valid reasons. The rest are just following the herd.
Salute to those mothers who take a break from their careers to be with their children during this very short but very precious phase of life. The rewards — physically, socially, and psychologically — are immense.
We chose Convent of Jesus and Mary after carefully weighing the most important factors in a child’s education: quality of education, distance from home and fees. For us, quality of education and culture outweighed everything else.
The moment I stepped into the school, I felt at home. While sitting in the admin office, the sound of “Good morning, Sir, may I come in?” touched my ears and I instantly knew this was a place where I belonged. As we entered the Sisters’ office, I made my daughter sit in the parents’ seat. I was immediately told that children cannot sit there — only parents. I felt protected, not schooled. Marjaan was gently asked to switch seats and was quickly given some candy while the staff conversed warmly with her. I felt safe. My wife felt relieved when the coordinator reassured us, “Don’t worry about her writing — we will teach her how to write.”
For us parents, technology and modernity can be brought into the home, but values, tradition, and culture are the most important aspects a school should provide these days. Sadly, that is severely lacking in many institutions. Most of what we see is theatrics and gimmicks that act like a placebo for anxious parents.
