When a mother harms her child: What lies beneath?

When a mother harms her child: What lies beneath?

A deeply disturbing incident involving a mother and her child has raised difficult questions about mental health, social pressure, family relationships and society’s understanding of motherhood.

Motherhood is widely associated with unconditional love, protection and sacrifice. Mothers are expected to put their children’s wellbeing before their own. However, when a mother harms her own child, people often immediately describe her as cruel or unnatural. The reality behind such tragedies can be far more complicated.

Previous cases of mothers harming their children have shown that severe psychological distress, untreated mental illness, trauma, domestic abuse and certain medical conditions can sometimes affect a person’s judgement and behaviour. The effects of some medications or other factors may also contribute to confusion or altered mental states. In some cases, a woman may not fully understand what she is doing at the time and may later experience overwhelming guilt and regret.

Social and family pressures can make these situations even more difficult. In many South Asian families, women still face strong expectations to tolerate marital problems for the sake of their children. Traditional advice often tells newly married women to remain in their husband’s home even when they face emotional, verbal or physical abuse.

Financial dependence creates another barrier. A woman may hesitate to leave an unhappy or abusive marriage because she fears becoming a burden on her parents or siblings. Rising living costs can make independent living especially difficult. Concerns about child custody and the possibility of children growing up under the care of a stepmother can also influence a mother’s decisions.

None of these circumstances can justify harming a child. Every child deserves protection, and anyone who causes deliberate harm must face appropriate legal consequences. However, understanding the factors behind such incidents remains essential if society wants to prevent them from happening again.

Islam places strong emphasis on compassion, justice and the dignity of women. Muslim teachings recognise women’s rights within marriage and family life, including rights related to inheritance and financial responsibility. The life of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) also provides examples of kindness and respect toward family members.

At the same time, cultural customs should not automatically be treated as religious commands. Messages that encourage women to silently endure abuse can prevent them from seeking help. Families need to create an environment where women can discuss domestic problems, emotional distress and mental-health concerns without fear of humiliation or rejection.

The real question, therefore, is not whether motherhood has lost its meaning. Instead, society must ask what happens when a mother reaches a severe psychological or emotional crisis without adequate support.

A mother who harms her child commits a grave act that requires accountability. But condemnation alone cannot address the underlying problem. Families, healthcare professionals and authorities must recognise warning signs and ensure that vulnerable mothers can access timely mental-health support.

Protecting children and supporting mothers are not opposing goals. Both are essential. Preventing such tragedies requires compassion, responsible reporting, stronger family support and greater awareness of mental health.

The sanctity of motherhood should not become a reason to ignore women who are suffering. Sometimes, saving a child also begins with recognising when a mother desperately needs help.